| and Monica says S&M |
[Aug. 18th, 2004|02:12 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  dirty | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing ~ nothing | ] |
ok... so maybe I should just kill this... I dont use it. I've been on my xanga. so yea Im going to be using xanga from now on cause this thing sucks ass and depending on who you are... you do too! :D
http://www.xanga.com/morbidpixie187 |
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| Dont call my name out your window Im leaving... |
[Aug. 16th, 2004|05:39 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | fucked up | ] |
| [ | music |
| | my own bloody tears | ] |
RANDOMxHERO13: then fucking go away and stop talking to me already. you tell me the same shit all the fucking time, and i fucking feel bad, i really fucking do, but all you do is bitch and whine about it. fuck off, you don't know shit, if you really wanna die, just fucking do it, but i really don't think you do, but then again, that doesnt fuckin' matter, right? god damn..
bye bye beautiful, dont bother to write...
Sara I'm sorry... Just know I love you |
|
|
| Good eye, sniper |
[Aug. 13th, 2004|02:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  dorky | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Memory ~ Sugarcult | ] |
omg so I met Chuck lastnight! Hes so nice... and a cutie. But he looks younger in person. But still cute none the less. Yes so I'm talking Monica. I'm bored.... bored... bored. Monica's telling me about her dream...lol. fighting a cat.... dont ask!
So get back back back to where we lasted... |
|
|
| I wonder who's crying now... |
[Aug. 7th, 2004|03:50 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Super Sadist ~ Jack Off Jill | ] |
so I still have alittle headache... but overall I think Im ok. I took alot of Vicidon lastnight before i went to bed. By 2 o clock my legs went numb... then I got sick to my stomach. I ened up puking and woke up my mom. I told her I got sick again cause of the pills i took. Pills and I dont mix well. I always end up getting sick to my stomach and throwing up. Even since I tried to O.D. on my iron pills... I just cant hold down more than 2 pills anymore. But then I went into my room... my mom told me to watch some t.v. and put on my fan so I did. Then my cell phone rang... it was Jesse... I was talking to her before I went into the bathroom. My leaving and not telling her must have worried her. After i got off the phone with her... I finished up watching Boy Meets World and fell asleep. I woke up around 6 and my whole body was numb and I couldnt move... I cried... again... and fell asleep. Luckly I didnt black out this time. I wole up around 11 with a little fever and my arms felt very tinglely. But im feeling better now... alittle.. and i have to work at 5. i work with Monica tonight. yay! I hope she doesnt have a hang over...
Super Nothing |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Aug. 6th, 2004|03:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  same as yestarday | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Pretty ~ Kidney Thieves | ] |
Yea so i woke up this morning a horrible headache. My mom called up to me to tell me she was leaving to take Jessica to the hospital to get a cast on her arm. Yea... Jessica broke her finger the other day and doctors have been giving her the run around. but yea... I got up to go down stairs to do my chore. I walked half way down and fell the rest. It was weird. I must have hit my nose cause I ended up getting a bloody nose. YUM... I have almost forgotten what blood tasted like. I almost cut myself lastnight... but i thought to myself... do I really want to start this again? NO! But anywho... after getting my nose to stop bleeding... I did my chore and got something to eat. But I forgot... why am I bothering to eat... ITS NOT GOING TO STAY DOWN! Im retarded... so I ate and ended up falling back to sleep on the bathroom floor until 1. But King had to go out so I was awakened by his barking... and begging to take him out. So then I watched some T.V. and now Im here... here... wow! I live such an eventful life! NOT! I have no life... Im a loser who deserves to die...
Yea... so 3 more day untill Warped Tour. hector is going with. ::sigh:: Im not to sure if I want to go or not. Im just not up to it. I'm just going to feel like an outkast... like I always do... always the third wheel. Whatever...
I think I'll go die now.. |
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| Love is just a role that we play |
[Aug. 5th, 2004|11:25 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | FAT UGLY PIECE OF SHIT | ] |
Aesthete
The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla
yea so I worked tonight. I got to work with Karryssa! YAY! Then I took her home. It was a date! lol. I wonder if Hector got a ticket for Warped Tour. I really dont want him to go. As mean as that sounds. But I just want it to be us girls. I hardly ever get to hang out with Allia anymore. But if he goes then I guess there's nothing I can do eh? oh well...
Im feeling pretty shitty again. I dont know why. I talked to Steve. I think he's going to finally ask Sara out on the 14th. About time! They should they are so cute together.
I seriously feel like a good for nothing fat ugly worthless piece of shit! Maybe I am. Maybe someone should just kill me and do the world a favor. Im just a waste of space. Who'd think it would take me 18 years to realize that? I'll get what I deserve oneday... and then everything will be better for everyone |
|
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| It's times like these where silence means everything... |
[Aug. 5th, 2004|01:24 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | These Days ~ Alien Ant Farm | ] |
4 more day til Warped Tour. yay! Allia is driving up there and if we are late coming back... Allia's mommy has given me promission to drive Allia's car back. I love being trusted. It feels so good. But then again... it's Allia's mom... she loves me to death.
9 more days untill the beach bash down at the quarry. Sara and I have been working on it for so long... well not really about a month so we've been working hard. I hope everything goes well. Our only problem is a PA SYSTEM. BEn has one but he said it's really crapy. So I guess Sara is going to ask the guys from Settle. Cross your fingers and how this all goes well. Oh and Cross your fingers for the guys from Sleepwell. They are in California right now. Hope they get signed! :-D
I hate forcing myself to smile. I've been doing that alot the past few days. I dont know if Im truely unhappy or if being Bi-polar has anything to do with it. I dont know. My mom is stopping me from doing anything this week. Im grounded to the house other than work. I dont know whats up her ass this week but it's pissing me off. I swear if she doesnt let me go to Warped Tour I'll flip the hell out and move the hell out. Im freaking 18 and she still treats me like Im 2. Tim and her have both already make the comment that if I dont "straighten up" I wont be attending the Beach Bash on the 14th. Um EXCUSE ME! I'm the other half of the freaking Beach Bash. Sara and I are the ones who put it together. gr freaking gr. Something needs to be done with me. I'm dead serious. I need help. Maybe I should start going back to Christine. Allia said I should go to Judy... her theropist. I dont know anymore. I want to go down to Wal-mart to and get an application. I hate my job it sucks. $6.15 an hour sucks! And now they have been cutting my hours cause of that little rat faced bitch. AHHHHHH! ::pulls out hair:: I cant take this anymore I freaking hate people! I just want to disappear. I think after the 14th Im just going to disappear for awhile... Stay away from everyone. The 19 - 23 I'll be home alone so maybe then I'll have some time to unwind and rewind and get myself straightened out. |
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| Love isnt always on time... |
[Aug. 3rd, 2004|03:41 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  good | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I wont forget you ~ Poison | ] |
1. Am I cute?:
2. Am I hot?:
3. Am I sweet?:
4. Am I crazy?:
5. Am I loveable?:
6. Am I funny?:
7. Am I annoying?:
8. Am I psycho?:
9. Am I daring?:
10. Am I a goody:
11. Am I sexy?:
WOULD YOU...
12. Hug me?:
13. Miss me if I was gone?:
14. Listen to my problems?:
15. Hug me if i cried?:
16. Be a good friend?:
17. Ever go out with me?:
18. If you already have would u do it again?:
19. Kiss me?:
20. Let me sleep on your shoulder?:
21. Marry me if u could?:
HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW ME?
22. When's my birthday?:
23. How tall am I?:
24. What school do I go to?:
25. Do i have any siblings --> names?? :
26. Who is my most current ex?:
27. Who is my best friend?:
28. Who am i crushing on/dating?:
29. Favorite animal?:
30. Favorite Color?:
31. Favorite TV show?:
32. Favorite song/songs?:
33. Favorite music group?:
IF YOU COULD...
34. Give me a new name, what would it be and why?:
35. Hook me up with someone (real), who would it be and why?:
36. Do one thing with me what would it be and why?:
37. Drop me one piece of advice, what would it be?:
JUST A FEW QUESTIONS
38. What do you love about me?:
39. What do you hate about me?(seriously):
40. What is my best quality?:
41. If you could change one thing about me what would it be?:
42. What is your honest opinion of me?:
I hate these things... but Im bored so humor me! |
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| To hell with you and all your friends |
[Aug. 2nd, 2004|11:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  flirty | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Dusty eating a bone haha | ] |
ahhhhhhhh! I missed the Still Standing video shot! What have I done?! Am I not obsessed?? I have failed them! Damn you Dasiy Dairy Bar... Damn you to hell! I have to work for you... and I didnt get to work for Still Standing! or atleast be in the video. Sara didnt get to go either. Sad... two of the biggest Still Standing fans werent at the video shot. But I want to get a camera for the 14th and make my own video... OF ALL THE STILL STANDING SONGS! haha scweet!
Well... wanna know something weird? I talked to Jesse lastnight. Jesse? you ask. JESSE... Brians Jesse. Yes She IMed me... or Brian did cause she thought I was going to poke her eye out with a spork. lol No... actually Jesse is very nice and really sweet. And odd enough we have alot in common. I enjoyed talking to her. I have nothing against her... never did. Brian is the one who fucked up... not her. But yea... she's really cool and I'm looking forward to talking to her again sometime... and maybe even meeting her sometime in the future.
So I worked tonight. AH! It sucked... like always. Amamda is no longer working there. She was going to put in two weeks notice but John called her and told her not to bother even coming in. She also moved back in with her mother. She isnt living with us anymore. OH! CHRIS! oh my christ... holy mother of hell CHRIS!! Amanda's moms boyfriends son! ahhh! He is so freaking hott! I'll have to get a picture oneday and show all of you... cause this child is one beautiful piece of work! ::drools:: Ahhhh! But he has a gf... but she's not his type. And no likes her. haha... so that wont last long. ok... that was mean and selfish. I'll just have to go over there oneday... oh I'll be prepared! hehe... oi freaking oi... what am I doing? |
|
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| SUGAR!! |
[Jul. 29th, 2004|05:33 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | hyper | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Monica trying to play the guitar | ] |
Yea so I guess Brian took me off his friends list! haha whatever. I dont care. The fact that he doesnt even want to be friends with me is silly. And Im silly. Brian if you are reading.. I'm making peace cause I hate you! Kayleigh: I wouldnt even talk to him... or waste my typing on him cause hes a bitch... hes a slut... and why cant i knot your hair?* oh wait she's talking to Monica. lol but yes... hate is such a strong word. And I dont hate. I just dont give a shit... Kayleigh: yea Rachael doesnt give a shit cause she just gave it to the toilet!* Umm... thanks for the update.. uhk. Yes well as far as "witchcraft" goes... Brian I did put a spell on you... your penis is going to shrink! haha...HA!
ok... its almost 6 and I had two AMPs so far tonight. Soda...alot! Cookie dough... and sugar cubes!! lots of sugar cubes.... and popcorn which is all over the floor cause me and Monica got into a sugar cube and popcorn fight! OH FUN!
Monica: fuck you!
Me: fuck you harder!!
wow I love these girls!
2 weeks! WARPED TOUR! wheeeee! I wish Monica could go!! ahhh... Hector better get his license so he can go... yes he better. anyway... Im gone |
|
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| I like you better with your mouth closed... |
[Jul. 28th, 2004|10:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | TBS | ] |
Im thinking about getting a tatoo. I want the Still Standing star but I dont know where to put it... and I think I was to put another design with it cause i dont want to feel like Im copying Sara. OMG! Sara! hehe yea so Sara had a dream...
It was my wedding day! hehe... and guess who I was marrying?? hmmmmm? JUSTIN! YAY! From Still Standing. Yes well... we were at the wedding. Sara was my maid of honor and Johnny was Justins best man. So we are all standing at the alter and Johnny is wearing a pink flersent suit! and it was satin!
Justin: Johnny! what happened to the suit I picked out for you?!
Johnny:*in gay voice and wrist action* I like this suit better!
Sara just keeps looking at him. in the mean time.... Alex is behind Sara grabbing her butt. Then out of nowhere a blonde come flying towards us saying WAIT! at this time the wedding hasnt even started yet. But anyway! He was begging Sara not to get married. It's John.
John: Sara you cant get married!
Sara: Its not my wedding
John: well you still cant!
Sara: hunna Im not but why
John:*gets all weird* cause I think Steve loves you!
John runs away. So the wedding contiues and Justin and I get married. Then Justin picks me up(????haha) and runs out the door to the limo. Everyone comes out side
Sara: Rachael... you didnt even say goodbye to me!!!
As we are driving away the guy from BDC come running towards Sara and Will(drummer) gets hit by the limo! So everyone runs over to help him.
Steve: Dont worry about him I love you!
Sara: I love you too but Will's your drummer!
Sara gets up to look at the driver to see that its justin and me in the passenger side.
Sara: JUSTIN! what are you doing?? you can hardly drive the bus!! Where's the driver??
Justin: in the back
Sara: no hunna! he suppose to be driving and you and rachael are suppose to be in the back!
Justin: oh so thats how it works?
WOW! lmao! Then Sara tries to get Will into a car to take him to the hosptial... but woke up!
I WANT TO MARRY JUSTIN! |
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| If I died tomorrow, would this song live on forever? |
[Jul. 28th, 2004|10:12 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | pissed, betrayed, depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the new Taking Back Sunday cd! | ] |
So, scream I heard about your message
and how it reeked of your indifference,
it bleeds horizontal straight from your wrists
(So scream louder now)
I'm bound to come around, I'm bound...
(I'm bound to come around)
but can’t you, can’t you feel it
Rolling off your lips
Tensing up your shoulders, c’mon say it is
It’s love
(It’s love)
Make it hurt
(I deserve it)
Well, It’s love
(It’s love)
Make it hurt
(I deserve it)
Well, it’s love, it’s love, it’s love
Make it hurt
I said I use the inconsistencies
I'm just a machine
You're the poster boy, their selling point,
the focus for the new campaign
(something has to be done)
I'm bound to come around, I'm bound...
(I'm bound to come around)
Oh but can't you, can't you feel it
rolling off your lips
tensing up your shoulders come on.
Well, It’s love
(It’s love)
Make it hurt
(I deserve it)
Well, It’s love
(It’s love)
Make it hurt
(I deserve it)
Well, it’s love, it’s love, it’s love
Make it hurt
The keys to the castle
are right where I left them
the princess would pay
just to die for attention
cause after all, well isn’t that
all that I’ve been after and
after all, well isn't that
all that i'm after yourself
Well I gave up in the end
(no way out)
I wanted you for nothing more
than hating you for what you were
and that's what you wanted to hear
(that's what you wanted to hear)
I wanted you for nothing more
than hating you for what you were
and that's what you wanted to hear
(that's what you wanted to hear)
I wanted you for nothing more
than hating you for what you were
and that's what you wanted to hear
(that's what you wanted to hear)
I wanted you for nothing more
than hating you for what you were
(that's what you wanted
and that's what you wanted to hear)
that's what you wanted to hear
well, that's what you wanted to hear
Remind me not to ever think of you again...
I hope I never see your face again...
Well I must be going... I have pictures in my wallet to burn and a bracelet to cut up into little pieces that I havent taken off since the day I got it. Fuck the world... seriously. Actually... im not going to burn or cut up... I have a better idea... I just have to call Brittany. Well I shall return later... maybe if not chances are Im dead. Or atleast we wish.
This all was only wishful thinking |
|
|
| every rose has its thorn |
[Jul. 26th, 2004|11:06 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sad | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Every Rose Has Its Thorn ~ Poison | ] |
Just think of this and me
As just a few of the many things to lie around,
to clutter up your shelves.
And I wish you weren't worth the wait
cause there's some things I'd like to say to you.
Now I could make this obvious, and you
You could deny me all in one breath
You could shrug me off your shoulders.
^^ This is sad... should I make it obvious? Should I just tell the whole world how you and I truly feel? Even if I did... would you deny it all. Would you deny everything you had said to me? I'm beginning to think it's more fear than confusion and greif that is keeping you away. But what are you afraid of? And trust me... disappearing isnt going to help. Just because I can't see you... no like it makes a difference as of now. But Im not going to forget you or what you said or what happened in the past. And you know what Im talking about. They say the first will never be forgotten. And to make matters more confusing... I fell in love. oi freaking oi... something I though I'd NEVER do. But I did. There was a time I made myself believe that you couldnt fall in love with someone unless they were in love with you. But is this true... I felt the same about you this whole time... wihtout knowing how you felt. I thought... no one is going to fall in love with me so therefore... I will never fall in love. But I was wrong. And I'm in love.... and Im falling. I wish I could just reach the bottom and end this pain now.
I blacked out again last night... I couldnt stop crying... and I blacked out. I didnt wake up until 12:00 this afternoon. When I black out They last for about 10 minutes then I snap out of it... still crying but calmer. This time I think I just cried myself to sleep within my black out.. or something like that. Maybe I should get those checked out eh? yesh I should. So Im going to Allia's tomorrow then I'm going to take her to the mall to get the new Taking Back Sunday cd with me. Then I'm going to Sara's to talk about the 14th! I cant wait. And I cant wait until Warped Tour! wheee... me Allia Kay Sara Steve and someother peoples! Did I just say peoples? ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Im starting to sound like Amanda! ::slaps self:: ok all better. No not really. I want to cry again. Grr! NO! Im not going to cry! Not again...
Whatever... I dont care anymore... why should I? |
|
|
| You and I'll just use a little patience |
[Jul. 25th, 2004|12:27 am] |
|
Shed a tear 'cause I'm missin' you
I'm still alright to smile
I think about you every day now
Was a time when I wasn't sure
But you set my mind at ease
There is no doubt
You're in my heart now
I sit here on the stairs
'Cause I'd rather be alone
If I can't have you right now
I'll wait, dear
Sometimes I get so tense
But I can't speed up the time
But you know, love
There's one more thing to consider
You and I've got what it takes
To make it, We won't fake it,
I'll never break it
'cause I can't take it
...little patience, mm yeah, mm yeah
need a little patience, yeah
just a little patience, yeah
some more patience, yeah
need some patience, yeah
could use some patience, yeah
gotta have some patience, yeah
all it takes is patience,
just a little patience
is all you need
I been walkin' the streets at night
Just tryin' to get it right
Hard to see with so many around
You know I don't like
Being stuck in the crowd
And the streets don't change
But baby the name
I ain't got time for the game
'cause I need you
Yeah, yeah, but I need you
Oo, I need you
Whoa, I need you
Oo, all this time
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yea... so here I am... online. gr freaking gr! And Brian got off! I was texting him on AIM on my cell phone but then I logged off of my cell phone so I could get online. And he was gone! jeez... and I really wanted to talk to him. ::sigh:: It's almost 12:30. haha Jesse IMed me and told me that someone was asking about Still Standing in a chatroom today.
OH OI!!! before I forget!!
QUARRY BEACH HIDEAWAY!! 340 OLD ALLENTOWN RD WINDGAP PA! AUGUST 14TH, 5:30P.M. ~ 10:00P.M.! STILL STANDING, SLEEPWELL, SHADE UNDER FIVE AND BURNING DOWN CENTRALIA!! $5 A BODY! hehe PLEASE COME. ALL PROFITS GO TO PINEBROOK SERVICE FOR CHILDREN AND YOUTH!
yes... come to the show! it'll be alot of fun!! wheee!
Wish Brian could come.... I've been wanting to take him to see Still Standing for awhile. And now that I actually have Still Standing at me and Sara's benefit.... he's in Texas! god damn it! Everyone is going to be there... hopefully! Cross your fingers. hmm... it would be funny if Jason and Ian came haha. ::sigh:: gr freaking gr! I feel weird! I dont know why... oh wait I do. grrr argh! yes well perhaps I should go. Yes I will. bye |
|
|
| Am I too lost to be saved? |
[Jul. 19th, 2004|10:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Broken ~ Seether feat. Amy Lee | ] |
badgurl6534: i have soup
badgurl6534: but its too hot
PoisonGirl x 999: lol
PoisonGirl x 999: you need a reverse microwave!
badgurl6534: oh my god!!!!!!!
badgurl6534: i do
PoisonGirl x 999: lol
badgurl6534: good thinking
badgurl6534: all i need is the freeon
^^ lol I love this girl! That's my Avril! lol...
Yea so Monica and I went ot Allentown today. Somehow we got lost... lmao! I went from Allentown to Walnutport and didnt take a right turn somewhere and ended up in Palmerton. lol it was funny. We stopped at two bars to ask for directions. But as you can see... I made it back. lol twas fun! But i have my sterio now. And Im a happy girl! hehe Still Standing! ahhh... I cant wait for the 14th. hmm.. I think Im going to get a ticket for Warped Tour... hehe
TAKING BACK SUNDAY!! |
|
|
| What is the point of this? |
[Jul. 18th, 2004|11:21 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Cute without the E (cut from the team) ~ TBS | ] |
So... I talked to Brian last night... and what a night it was. Seriously someone should just shoot me! I let out all my feelings... well kinda... that I had bottled up inside. ahhh!! Im so freaking retarded! But I broke down and cried to the point where I blacked out. But I guess Im ok... its not one of my more serious kind of black outs. But I woke up this morning... well at 2 actually. And Im still tired as hell. This black out took alot out of me. I need to get away for awhile. Or something... I need to unwind and relax and just piece myself back together. So here I am... talking to Steve lol. Funny kind. I just got off the phone with Sara. She misses him so much. Shes so cute. I love her.
I want to go to Warped tour... I want to see TBS! I should see if I can still get tickets. grr... I want!
PoisonGirl x 999: What kind of products do you use in your hair
StalkxThexGround: haha
StalkxThexGround: im not telling you
StalkxThexGround: shes going to buy them
PoisonGirl x 999: no I want to know.... it has nothing to do with Sara... I like your hair
StalkxThexGround: oh
StalkxThexGround: well in that case, i use bed head wax crap that costs like 17 bucks for a little can of it and regular hairspray
PoisonGirl x 999: but how do you do that little flippy thing then?
StalkxThexGround: i dont have hairspray in that part
PoisonGirl x 999: how big is your gaug? and that was the green thing in your ear before?
StalkxThexGround: its a 00
PoisonGirl x 999: do you know that for sure?
StalkxThexGround: nope
StalkxThexGround: but my friend told me it is, he knows all about that kind of shit
PoisonGirl x 999: but what was the green thing in your freaking ear
StalkxThexGround: oh
StalkxThexGround: haha im sorry, a marker cap
PoisonGirl x 999: like a crayola marker?
StalkxThexGround: yeah
StalkxThexGround: one of the skinny markers
PoisonGirl x 999: oh ok
^^ok... no Im not some freaky stalker I was asking for Sara...lol... oh the thing I do for my loved ones!
PoisonGirl x 999: If i called would you answer the phone
StalkxThexGround: i would have to sign offline
StalkxThexGround: oh hahahaha
StalkxThexGround: my info
PoisonGirl x 999: lmao!
^^haha this kid is great! I can see why Sara likes him so much...lol
Well off to bed I go... Monica and I are going to Allentown in the morning. |
|
|
| whee |
[Jul. 18th, 2004|01:52 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
Well today was fun. I got out of work at 3 and Monica meet up with me at Daisy. hehe... we went to the quarry then to Rita's and Dunkin Dounuts. The we went to Wal-Mart where we saw Billy and Trish. Then we went to the Mall. At the Mall Monica lol did stealth mode everywhere! lmao... it was great. So kid asked if she was alright. lol. Then we went home to look for Monica's wallet... which was no where to be found... so if you find please return it! The we went out to eat... with Billy and da gang... uh yea... at Micky D's... where Monica once again did stealth mode!! lmao then we went home... lol Oh and we also went to Giant but Ben wasnt working but came in anyway! And he asked us why we were there so early.... cause we know he works at 10. lol... for this is true... cause we are Ben's true stalkers! hehe...
Yea so Billy gave me his cell phone munber and told me to call him to hang out sometime. I found it odd. But I guess I could call him... lol... and save him from Laura. lol Poor Billy.
Well I guess me and Monica are going to Allentown on Monday. I want to go to the flea market tomorrow. |
|
|
| What's the point of this? |
[Jul. 17th, 2004|12:47 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | bouncy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Take your time ~ Still Standing | ] |
yea so... my dad called me today. He wished me a belated happy birthday. When he called I didnt know who it was at first... he kinda scared me. Well the man hasnt called to wish me a happy birthday since I was 13. Im 18 now! Im fucking 18! wow... I cant believe its been almost 5 years now without my real father in my life. I know what some of you are thinking... it could be worse. But to put it in a way that you would hopefully understand... I use to be the center on my dad's world... then he got married to this one... and that ended. For 13 years it was all about me... but the last 5... umm.. yea you get the point. I know the only reason he called was because he was talking to my grandmother and she said something about me and she mostlikey asked him if he called me. So he had to make himself look good. Im not stupid.. and Im tried of this shit. Im tried of Gwens shit. Sorry to break this to her... but I may be 18 but I still get child support. Im still in school and he has to pay while Im in college. so in your fucking face!
I talked to Brian today... he said something about coming up here... I kinda wish he would... I want to see him again. But then at the same time... I dont. Its weird. I just dont...er.. you know. bah! I will not start this again. I cant. Im finally getting it all together. ARGH! MAybe I should go to bed... I have to work at 10:30.
I get out of work at 3... then Im going away with Monica, I think I have to pick up Kay... not sure... I have to call her.
PoisonGirl x 999: Small fry has until tomorrow to call Sara
badgurl6534: i never heard of them
PoisonGirl x 999: Small fry = Brain from Sleepwell
PoisonGirl x 999: Still Standing
badgurl6534: JOHNNY!!
badgurl6534: sex
badgurl6534: haha
PoisonGirl x 999: hott sex?
badgurl6534: ewwww
badgurl6534: !!!
PoisonGirl x 999: you and Johnny?
badgurl6534: sorry
badgurl6534: i thought it said butt sex
badgurl6534: theres a glare
PoisonGirl x 999: lmao
badgurl6534: shut up |
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| Is it my birthday? oh no... 4 more hours |
[Jul. 14th, 2004|01:14 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Lost without eachother ~ Hanson | ] |
Yes it is my birthday! hehehe... or you want to get all technical eh? I was born around 5 something... so what!! Leave me be! Im enjoying the fact that Im 18 now! wheeee.
So here the plan! wheee plan! Monica is coming over and we are going to go see my sister cause she is sick. Then we are going to go home and wait for Kayleigh. wheee.... my Kay!! hehe Then we are going to go to K-Mart. The cafe hopping! wheee! But I am forced to spend this day without Sara and Allia... ::sad face:: I thought Brain was going to be here to... but I guess not. Hector, Allia, Mommy.. you all will see... I am right and you all are wrong! Just watch and see! BLAH! Well.. I better go to bed Im tired as all heck. night ya'll |
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| ew |
[Jul. 13th, 2004|01:54 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | apathetic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Separate Ways ~ Still Standing | ] |
so my birthday is tomorrow. ::sigh:: Sad... what am I doing? nothing! Im going to be 18 and Im doing nothing! Did I mention Im doing nothing?! anyway... LJ bugs me so Im using my xanga again
morbidpixie187
Still Standing kicks ass!
Im feeling down wo oh
and I cant change at all
Im feeling down again
feel so low
heart stopping
beat dropping
Im not alive at all
Im weaken by my sight
and I need to feel stronger
so I last longer
Its nothing
or can it be something?
YEA!
Take your time
relax unwind
everything will be just fine
take your time
relax unwind
And everything will be just fine
take your time
its your time unwind
And yestarday I felt the same way I always do
disturbed by the fact that I dont feel alive
and yestarday I felt alone again
wish I could change my mind
cause its tearing me apart
heart stopping
beat dropping
im not alive at all
Im weaken my my sight
and I need to feel stronger
so I last longer
its nothing
or can it be something?
YEA!
take you time
relax unwind
everything will be just fine
take your time
relax unwind
everything will be just fine
take your time take your time
everything will by just fine
take your time
relax unwind
And everything will be just...fine |
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